The Penny has finally dropped! A Student´s Tale....

I feel in the last few days that the penny has dropped. I have been a FISU Meditator for 2years now; I am a 22 year old student.

I came to Cyprus this summer to spend some time with my family who live here, my Dad, my Brother, his wife and their 2 beautiful children, Paris and Chloe. I became irregular about 4months ago and did not have the motivation to start again. Whilst in Cyprus I had some difficulties with some girls who didn't like my relationship with our mutual friend. I found this really tough, when I was worried or with them I would do Gurushakti spontaneously, it helped me have the strength to just be around them. I never reacted to their actions, but always smiled and thought 'um vaka vaka'.

I still didn't meditate, I though it won't make the problem go away, but what I didn't think at the time was that it may not make the problem go away but it will ease the sting of their actions and help my attitude towards the problem. 

After two weeks all my friends, along with those girls left to go back to England. I had one other friend who lives in Cyprus who was working full time. I met up with her occasionally and spoke every day but after a week or so I felt an overwhelming sense of sadness and loneliness and just felt really sorry for myself.

About a week ago I spoke to Rajesh on email and I found the motivation to start meditating again. I decided to download a few satsangs from fisu.org so I could listen to them on the beach. This was about a week ago but being regular and having time to myself to think I suddenly had an overwhelming sense that the penny has dropped. I was on the beach and it was almost like a 'mental Tsunami'. I feel so passionately about my love for FISU, I see the path and I recognise my growth and unfoldment. I heard you should not analyse or measure how you have changed, but I cannot help but look back and think of how FISU meditation has helped me become a better person with a purer mind.

I go to the beach all day on my own, but what I have come to realise is that thousands of miles away from my family and friends. Even though I am on my own I am never alone with FISU.

I turned 22 yesterday, and I woke up without my Mum or sisters at home, with no English mobile and 2,500 miles away from the place I call home...but I felt so happy and content! I did not care about gifts, nor did I have expectations about receiving cards or presents or what I would do that day. I did not feel lonely, I went on facebook and saw all the kind messages from friends and family, and then I received a lovely birthday card from my friend who is travelling in Thailand.  I felt so much love, so much appreciation and emotion built up that I had never appreciated before. I saw my birthday, not as a day for attention and presents as I used to, but actually the day I was born 22 years ago was the day I could get back on the path of unfoldment and work off all that karma.

I always used to worry about getting older/old. Now, I am happy to be another year older because I am in a good place now, I am on the path destined for me and I am happy.

Now another day has passed and I have continued to be regular, I feel so happy and content and so many things inside that I have not felt before. I smile more; I laugh more and see other people as divine as you and me. I see the samskaras in others, and it makes me want to teach and help others on their path to unfoldment.

So, I felt today I would share this with someone...anyone...or just write it down. I see people, hear the words they speak, and so desperately wish they would find their path to unfoldment wherever it may be but I know everything happens for a reaons. I feel so lucky to have found mine and look forward to the day each soul find theirs, because a happy and joyful time is ahead.

Love and Namaste

Zoe

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